Life After 60

Life After 60

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An interesting article from The Hindu.
Life can begin at 60, it is all in your hands! Many people feel unhappy, health-wise and security-wise, after 60 years of age, owing to the diminishing importance given to them and their opinions. But, it need not be so, if only we understand the basic principles of life and follow them scrupulously. Here are ten mantras to age gracefully and make life after retirement pleasant.

1. Never say I am aged' :�
There are three ages, chronological, biological, and psychological. The first is calculated based on our date of birth; the second is determined by the health conditions; the third is how old we feel we are. While we don't have control over the first, we can take care of our health with good diet, exercise and a cheerful attitude. A positive attitude and optimistic thinking can reverse the third age.

2. Health is wealth:�
If you really love your kit and kin, taking care of your health should be your priority. Thus, you will not be a burden to them. Have an annual health check-up and take the prescribed medicines regularly. Do take health insurance coverage.

3. Money is important:�
Money is essential for meeting the basic necessities of life, keeping good health and earning family respect and security. Don't spend beyond your means even for your children. You have lived for them all through and it is time you enjoyed a harmonious life with your spouse. If your children are grateful and they take care of you, you are blessed. But, never take it for granted.

4. Relaxation and recreation:�
The most relaxing and recreating forces are a healthy religious attitude, good sleep, music and laughter. Have faith in God, learn to sleep well, love good music and see the funny side of life.

5. Time is precious:�
It is almost like holding a horses' reins. When they are in your hands, you can control them. Imagine that everyday you are born again. Yesterday is a cancelled cheque. Tomorrow is a promissory note. Today is ready cash - use it profitably. Live this moment; live it fully, now, in the present time.

6. Change is the only permanent thing: We should accept change - it is inevitable. The only way to make sense out of change is to join in the dance. Change has brought about many pleasant things. We should be happy that our children are blessed.

7. Enlightened selfishness:�
All of us are basically selfish. Whatever we do, we expect something in return. We should definitely be grateful to those who stood by us. But, our focus should be on the internal satisfaction and the happiness we derive by doing good for others, without expecting anything in return. Perform a random act of kindness daily.

8. Forget and forgive:�
Don't be bothered too much about others' mistakes. We are not spiritual enough to show our other cheek when we are slapped in one. But for the sake of our own health and happiness, let us forgive and forget them. Otherwise, we will be only increasing our blood pressure.

9. Everything has a purpose:�
Take life as it comes. Accept yourself as you are and also accept others for what they are. Everybody is unique and is right in his own way.

10. Overcome the fear of death:�
We all know that one day we have to leave this world. Still we are afraid of death. We think that our spouse and children will be unable to withstand our loss. But the truth is no one is going to die for you; they may be depressed for some time. Time heals everything and they will go on. �

Secrets of Old Age.
If you have time for one very special email today this is it.
Take the time and accept the secrets of old age.

 

Aasra' Suicide Prevention Center's 15th Anniversary

It started with a simple ‘tring, tring’ many years ago- way back, this day, 13th Sept 1998
And now you have a treasure chest that's begun to overflow with unbiased caring, concern and empathy
For 15 years of uninterrupted service to the distressed, depressed and suicidal much pain did we share,
We’ve travelled a long way, taking unbearable pain and turning it into hope- One that re-engages and rekindles the desire to live again.,
Renewed and re-energised . Looking afresh at life’s possibilities. And helping choose the leap of faith over death and dying.
Accumulating a treasure trove of good wishes over the years. Doubling the joys of givers and making the lives of the depressed and suicidal worthy of Life!
Congratulations to all our volunteers, patrons, supporters and well-wishers

Compassion Fatigue- A rsult of traumatic public events

Kind & stressed

COMPASSION FATIGUE

By Gitanjali Chandrasekharan, Mumbai Mirror 

 

Compassion fatigue is common in times of public trauma, like with last week's rape.

Early this year, as the country reeled under shock after a 23-year-old New Delhi resident was gang-raped, and died of her injuries, Powaibased trauma therapist Hvovi Bhagwagar noticed her women clients were rescheduling their late evening appointments.

"Several said they didn't feel safe visiting the clinic that 'late at night'," says Bhagwagar, about appointments scheduled post 8 pm. This despite the fact that her clinic sits inside a busy mall. Another patient, a 17-year-old girl, stopped coming to the clinic altogether. "When I inquired, her mother asked me how could I expected the young girl to drive down alone to Powai when newspapers were buzzing with news of sexual assault," adds Bhagwagar, who has been practising for 13 years. It's no different this time around, after news of a 22-year-old photojournalist's gang rape last week.

While an increased sense of caution following news of this sort is normal, Bhagwagar says the behaviour her patients exhibited was linked to Vicarious Trauma (VT).

The empathy overdose

Dr Siddharth Ashvin Shah, medical director of Washington DC metrobased Greenleaf Integrative Strategies, says VT is a phenomenon in which people develop symptoms of trauma (numbing, hyper-vigilance, nightmares) when exposed to information concerning someone else's trauma.

While this is commonly seen in care-givers, social workers and counsellors, even those exposed to tragic news in the media are susceptible to it.

Dr Shah adds that the psychological reason for VT's occurrence is not completely understood. "Still, it would not be speculative to suggest that the following contribute to VT: the human capacity for empathy, the brain's mirror neurons and exposure." Empathy conveys the content of the exposure - people react because they imagine the suffering as if it were happening to them. Mirror neurons in specific regions of the brain fire as if an activity were being done physically (even though a person is aware of it happening to another). Exposure refers to the duration, frequency and depth of contact with the traumatic story.

Speaking about last week's incident, Bhagwagar says that those who identify with the girl - young working women or those who come from the same profession as her - are at higher risk. But even men can show signs. "Typically, husbands and fathers could become overprotective of women in their lives. They might suggest they take a different route back home from work, even if the road they walk on is busy and well-lit," adds Bhagwagar.

The symptoms

In 2008, Bhagwagar says, there were reports that students at city schools seemed withdrawn, and lacked focus in class. "This was after the 26/11 attacks in Mumbai, and we realised that the children had been exposed to terror via television for three days, and didn't know how to process their feelings," she adds. The parents had to be advised to stop watching news 24x7, or watch it on their laptops.

Immediately after witnessing a traumatic event vicariously, it's natural to suffer anxious moments. But if the symptoms persist for more than a month after the event, it's a sign that Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) is setting in. Shah and Bhagwagar say it's best to consult a therapist in this case.

Interestingly, there are enough people, who after exposure to news about war, natural disasters, accidents, terror attacks and sexual assault, don't react the same way.

Trauma can be layered one on top of another. Those who have faced a similar trauma in the past find themselves vulnerable to similar attacks - in the case 26/11, those who frequented the areas and hotels that were targeted by the terrorists - can experience both a retriggering of past trauma plus VT.

Dr Shah says, "For instance, journalists covering the 9/11 attacks experienced a triple layering of trauma. As journalists, they were present during the attacks and primarily affected; those who had experienced prior trauma faced a re-trigger; and those who continued to report on it found themselves vicariously traumatised by stories they were covering."

Dealing with it

While one would argue that after attacks like last week's, it would be normal for any woman in the city to be anxious and alert, Bhagwagar points out there's a difference between the two. "Alertness results in problem-solving behaviour, whereas anxiety leads to avoidance behaviour."

Reaching out for help is important. Speak to your friends and family about your emotions, and reach out for professional help if symptoms last longer than usual.

SIGNS YOU MAY BE SUFFERING FROM VT

» Hyper-vigilance (anticipating that something horrible will happen; increased obsession with bad news)
» Exaggerated startle response
» Emotional instability
» Depression
» Nightmares
» Flashbacks (visual, auditory or olfactory memories intruding the consciousness)
» Physiologic instability (racing heartbeat)
» Distorted thinking (confusion)
» Avoidance (staying away from reminders of the event; memory gaps; occupationally, this could mean extreme discomfort continuing to cover violent events)
» Loss of hope (believing that no one can make a positive difference)
» Emotional numbing (not enjoying socialising with others)
» Dissociation (decreased awareness of one's surroundings)
» Maladaptive behaviours (excessive alcohol use, over/under eating)

Aasra- IASP Suicide Prevention Day Sept 10th, 2013, Light a candle 8 pm

Invite for Aasra's Suicide Prevention Day/Week Activity (Refuse The Abuse with St Andrews College Students)

Aasra's Refuse the Abuse campaign with St Andrews College Students

Suicide Prevention Week 8th to 14th Sept 2013

Suicide Prevention Week
It's time for each of us to take responsibility for the suicides happening around us. Take the Pledge. Prevent Suicides. Suicide Prevention is Everybody's responsibility